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A candle to guide our beautiful boy on his journey through those Pearly Gates he now belongs to. Our hearts are breaking but we are glad to know he is with loved ones already there and waiting for him to take care of him until we meet with them all again. We love you Bam and we are thankful you are no longer suffering pain and discomfort as you have for so much of your life. Bandit died as a result of renal failure after a near fatal accident back in 2003 leaving him with no control of his bladder and having to have his bladder expressed several times daily. He never complained even when uncomfortable, he was happy that he had survived to stay with us - his loved ones and we were thankful to have his loving soul with us for as long as we did.
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| Posted by Jennifer and Heath on 02/01/2009 |
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You are with our loved ones now Bam Bam. Until we meet again.
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| Posted by Gail Brady on 02/02/2009 |
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We'll give you a daisy a day dear,
we'lll give you a daisy a day,
We'll love you until
the rivers run still
and we'll give you a daisy a day.
xxxx
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| Posted by Jennifer and Heath on 02/02/2009 |
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Its nanny darling Bam Bam and I am loving you always and missing you already.
I remember you greeting me at the gate when I came to visit and eagerly being pat on the head with the back of my hand or sitting there happily with me while I hand fed you BBQ chicken pulled apart in small pieces that were easy for you to chew.
I remember how proud you were of your beautiful white coat and always grooming yourself and keeping clean and handsome.
Our big handsome boy, we will all miss you very much darling. I am glad that you have no more pain. Love Nanny xxx
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| Posted by Daphne McCarthy on 02/03/2009 |
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This is our 3rd night without you Bam Bam and it is not getting any easier. I am still crying at the drop of a hat at anything that reminds me of you. My beautiful beautiful boy.
I feel so guilty that I couldnt help you, I feel guilty in case I jumped in too quickly and the Vet gave you the needle too soon, I worried you were in pain like the Vet said and I didnt want you to suffer but now it is I and Heath who suffer.
I will light a candle for you every single day I am alive now to remember how much I love you.
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| Posted by Jennifer McCarthy (Mummy) on 02/03/2009 |
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Hello our beautiful boy. We cry for you every day but it is still only the 4th day and we realise it is still hard but you are here with us my darling. We felt you on the first night and heard your meow - both of us. We know it was your goodbye. May you be happy in the Meadows of Rainbow Bridge and promise you will be waiting for us when the time comes around. We love you Bam.
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| Posted by Mummy, Heath, Sox and Nan on 02/03/2009 |
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This is the 4th night of your passing and we are slowly realising that you are in a happy place but we still miss you and love you with all our heart, darling boy.
We will never forget you until the day we die and we are reunited. All of us.
Rest in peace our darling Bam Bam
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| Posted by Jennifer McCarthy (Mummy) on 02/04/2009 |
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5 nights tonight since you left us Bam and I can almost get through the day without crying - well without crying much.
We miss you terribly darling. I have buried you in the garden at our new house and we will be with you soon darling boy. I have put an angel headstone there to guard you.
Until we meet again our darling boy xxxx
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| Posted by Mummy, Heath, Sox and Nan on 02/05/2009 |
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This is the 6th night now since you left us and I am waiting to wake up and realise it was all a terrible terrible dream. But that isnt going to happen, is it my darling Bam Bam? You have gone and I am still reeling from the pain.
We move on Monday to the new house - the one I got for you and Sox so that you would have a yard to play in and relax on the soft green grass but you never got to see it and I am hurting for you. I am so sorry you didnt get to see how much I love you and wanted you to have a beautiful place to be in But Bam I could never leave you behind and we buried you in the yard of the new house so that you can watch over us and we can know that your love is always close by.
We all love and miss you so my darling boy.
Forever your adoring Mummy, brothers Heath and Sox and Nanny xxx
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| Posted by Mummy, Heath, Sox and Nan on 02/07/2009 |
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Hello my darling boy,
Over a week has passed now and the pain isnt as raw but I still cry when I think of you and the way you meowed when I got home and loudly in the morning when you wanted to go outside and I was trying to sleep in, lol.
I miss you Bam and I pray you are happy and at peace now my beautiful boy.
Everyone seems to be getting on with life but you and I were linked a lot tighter than most because of your reliance on me to express your bladder a few times every day and I became so used to organising my life around that, I ceased to have a life outside of you and our little family. Dont get me wrong, Im not complaining or regret it for one minute but now I just dont know what to do with myself.
I suddenly have all this time on my hands and I just keep coming to this site where I feel some peace and consolation and can say what I need to without anyone thinking I am being over-dramatic. You were and always will be, a big part of my life Bam. I love and miss you so Mummy's darling boy.
Mummy
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| Posted by Mummy (Jennifer) on 02/09/2009 |
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Hello again my darling boy. Im here with your brother Sox and he is lonely without you too. He walks the rooms of the new house meowing and calling you, not understanding where you've gone. I took him outside yesterday for the first time since we moved on Monday and showed him your grave. He looked confused and continued on looking for you, calling you in his loud meow he used to talk to you.
Bam Bam, I have to go away for work again next week and I am sitting here crying because it is the first time in 6 years that I have been anywhere and not had to organise for Heath and Nan to take you to the vet to get your bladder expressed every day. I have come to the realisation that my whole life was organised around loving and caring for you and I am so lost now my darling boy. Everything I did to keep you with us was in vain - you have gone and I cant bear it Bam, I just cant bear it.
I miss you boy.
Love you with all my heart, mummy xx
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| Posted by Mummy, Heath, Sox and Nan on 02/12/2009 |
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I have lit a candle for your precious cat Bam Bam,he is having lots of fun and is in perfect health now in Heaven, and he loves you so much and will allways be with you because of everthing you did for him.
R.I.P Bam Bam
Love Mary x
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| Posted by mary bryan on 02/20/2009 |
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It was 3 whole weeks yesterday since u left us darling Bam Bam. When does it stop hurting? When do i stop thinking i have to buy u more food because u r no longer here? When do i stop blinking back the tears over u? Why do i feel like i am the only one in the family who hasnt forgotten u? I miss u so much darling. Know i will always miss u and love u my boy. I will always love u. We will always love u. Xxxx
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| Posted by mummy and heath and nan and sox on 02/23/2009 |
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As a fellow cat owner, please accept my sincerest condelences. My cat Tigger passed away during xmas holiday. I know and understand your pain.
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| Posted by Edgar on 02/25/2009 |
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It was one whole month yesterday Bam, and still I cry for you almost every day and whenever I look at your little grave in our yard.
I feel so sick today and I really think it is because I was so upset yesterday because I couldnt get on the internet and post my candle for you.
My darling sweet sweet boy I have cried a river of tears over you. People who know me well, know how much I loved you and what we encountered together in our bid to stay with eachother.
I got myself in financial and legal trouble because I wouldnt let you die and I would do it again if I had to, you were my beautiful boy and now I am left here with Sox (Kitten) who still walks the house crying out for you to answer. It is heartbreaking and my heart will never stop breaking over you Bam. I miss you with all my heart darling. Love Mummy xxx
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| Posted by Jennifer McCarthy (Mummy) on 03/02/2009 |
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5 long weeks without you darling Bam. When will this emptiness and pain go away like you had to? I miss and love you more than you could ever realise darling. I wish you could roll on the soft green grass and feel the sun on your coat. Love Mummy xo
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| Posted by jennifer (Mummy) McCarthy on 03/08/2009 |
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Tonight is 6 weeks since u had to leave us darling boy. I feel so much guilt and pain that u were suffering and I didnt realise how much. I hope there is no more pain and that u will b waiting for me when its my time to join u and my daddy and nan and brothers, Pete and Larry and pet relatives Pepper, Shamrock, Smokie [my smookie], our beautiful Buttercup, Wiggles, Meanie, my darling Misty, nan,s and my Brandy and my beloved Penny - my first cat and the poor little black and white kitten whose name I have blanked out due to trauma of running him over. I have loved each and every one of you and will be with you all one day. I miss u my darling Bam x
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| Posted by Mummy on 03/15/2009 |
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It was already 7 weeks on Sunday darling boy. I have been on here to light candles for you before but I was in the country for work and attempted to do it from my mobile and it didnt work. But you are always in my thoughts darling. Especially when I had to go away for several days and there was no BamBam to be anxious over worrying about whether or not you would let th evet express your bladder because you usually took objection to it if I was unable to be there. It was so weird my darling boy - going away and not having to organise anything for you - easier but lonlier (if that makes any sense). I long to feel happy again and the only way I can is to play your video over and over again when you were greeting me at the gate when I got home from work, your lovely face peering into the camera phone and meowing loudly like you always did when you wanted attention NOW. Oh Bam Bam, I miss you so much darling. I sit watching your grave and I know it isnt your beautiful soul there but I feel some closeness to you thinking that your body is there with me, with us, enjoying the yard and the sun finally. Why did God choose that life for you my darling? Why couldnt it be sunshine and smiles always? Its after midnight again and I still havent slept a proper night's sleep since you left. Life is getting easier but not easier for me to cope without you darling. I love you and miss you with all my heart Bam Bam xxxxx Mummy forever
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| Posted by Jennifer McCarthy (Mummy) on 03/24/2009 |
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hello darling Bam, my wonderful boy, today marks exactly 2 months since you left us and it feels like only yesterday pain wise amd yet it feels like a lifetime without seeing your kind beautiful face around us or heard that loud meow you used to wake us up each morning, like "hello, im awake down here and Im ready to go outside in the warm morning sun so get up because I know Your up there and awake", lol. I miss u Bam. I love u so much and will never get over being without u boy. Until we meet again, Mummy xox
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| Posted by Jennifer [Mummy] McCarthy on 04/01/2009 |
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Happy Easter my darling BamBam. Today is hard without u but it also marks 10 weeks since u left us. I never forget u my boy or ir dear sweet face and gentle playful nature. I can never forget u and everything u were to me and still continue to be. Please be waiting for me darling. I dont think u will have to wait too long. I love u Bam x
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| Posted by Jennifer McCarthy on 04/12/2009 |
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I am missing you so much tonight Bam. I feel lost and lonely and the tears are streaming down my face as I write this and I just cant accept you had to be taken from me after everything you went through to stay. I am so sorry they couldnt help you my darling. Its eating me up inside and I find it so hard to keep going but I have to for your brothers - human Heath and pussycat Sox. We all miss you darling. I stand on the verandah and gaze at the Angel watching over your gravesite and I wish you were here to enjoy our yard and sunshine on your coat and the grass beneath your feet. You were stuck in that horrid old courtyard with no grass for nearly 3 years because I struggled to pay rent and now things are just starting to get better you had to go away. Why did God do this to us? And now I am not feeling very well these days and I keep pushing myself to get through each day but I dont feel like waking up anymore. I feel so privileged to have been there at the moment you took your final breath and I pray you will be waiting for me. Love Mummy xxx
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| Posted by Jennifer McCarthy (Mummy) on 04/15/2009 |
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God Bless you Bam-Bam, may you be forever in the Lords care. Never again in any pain. Only the true unconditional Love, you experienced w/ Jennifer and the rest of your family. God Bless your Mummy, for saving you as a kitten, and taking the best care of you possible!!! I hope you run into Bear-Bear across the Rainbow Bridge. He is so gentle and sweet, w/all animals and people.
Posted by Kathy 4/15/09
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| Posted by Kathy on 04/15/2009 |
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Another week goes by darling Boy and things just never seem to get better for us no matter what. I try and try and yet everything goes wrong for us and I feel that I used to be strong and able to cope with anything when I had you. Not so anymore boy. I lost my job the other day and I dont know what we are going to do. There is no Bam Bam to stroke and make me feel better. Sox is here but he is so self absorbed unlike you. You could always sense it when I needed you and just happily sit there with me. I feel more alone than ever Bam. No friends, no-one that really trues if I am here or not and I miss you so badly. Always know I think of you every day darling boy. My dear sweet Bam Bam, give my Daddy a kiss this week on 24th for his birthday and I will be thinking of you. All of my beloved pets who have gone, all my dear loved family members and friends who have departed this life. Wishing that you were all here with me but knowing that you are in my heart forever and a day. Mummy
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| Posted by Jennifer (Mummy) McCarthy on 04/19/2009 |
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My darling Bam Bam,
It was 3 months on the 1st of May and I am sorry I could not get on the website until now. Your brother's computer was blocking me and I didnt know how to unblock it until now when someone helped me.
Darling Boy I look out in our backyard where your cold little body lies in the grave Heath and I dug for you with the Angel headstone watching over you and I cry my heart out.
Bam, I feel such pain, such guilt that I couldnt help you this time and that I had to finally say goodbye. Its eating me inside Bam and I just dont know how to get it out of my head. I cant even think about you for 1 minute without tears streaming down my face and I can hardly see the computer screen now.
Oh Bam, when will this pain and emptiness go away? Why did God have to take you away from us? from me? why did you have to suffer for so long before you could finally lay to rest in peace and no pain or suffering? Why do beautiful animals ever have to leave us when we love them so? Why is it that pets that are loved so dearly are taken from their beloved families and poor suffering creatures that are mistreated are left with those monsters to suffer? Why does it happen? I feel so angry today. Angry and teary and I am really missing your beautiful face looking up at me as you sit at my feet when I was on the computer. Just silent company but we needed no words between us - just a reassuring pat every now and then and those beautiful soulful eyes. Oh Bam, I feel so sick today like I dont want to do anything but sit here and cry but I have to work and I just dont feel like it.
I still think of you every day darling. Every single day. I love you Bam, from your adoring Mummy xxx
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| Posted by Mummy on 05/10/2009 |
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Hi Bam, I have been trying to limit the times I come on here to every month now because I get so upset but I needed to see your face once more.
Bam I still feel so totally destroyed that I could do nothing more to help you and that you had to suffer and go the way you did instead of dying happily in your sleep of old age. Isnt that the way everyone should go? Why then do people and animals I love have to be taken away from me always with such cruelty and suddeness so I cant prepare myself.
People used to tell me to put you down that you were too much trouble but you werent trouble to me. I used to get so tired sometimes and get angry that I had to do it but then I would remember that it wasnt your fault that you were like that and I would feel so guilty for that little resentment and it would all come flooding back how you tried so hard to get better, how I travelled to your clinic for almost 10 weeks every single night after working 11 hours and sit there with you to hand feed you just to make sure you knew how much I loved you and needed you to get better, All the hopes that you would have a normal life again were shattered but not my love and I kept going, paying the vet to come to our house twice a day to express your bladder and going without food to pay for it and then learning eventually to do it myself and sometimes resenting that I couldnt have a normal life either. But Bam I would swap it all in an instant again if I could have you back with me and never feel resentful about anything again.
I love you Bammy xxxx
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| Posted by Jennifer on 05/27/2009 |
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hey bam bam, pretty puddytat. just wanna say hi, i'm one of your mommy's friend
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| Posted by Edgar on 06/16/2009 |
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Hello my darling boy, its been a while and I felt so guilty that the 1st June came and went and I havent been on. But I havent been dealing with things too well lately boy and I couldnt face seeing your beautiful face on the screen and not have you by my side like before.
I miss you most when I am up late at night and you used to sit next to me on the computer in the garage and keep me company. Your life was so unfair beautiful boy but always know just because you werent allowed to come inside the house much because we had carpet and you leaked from your bladder when you relaxed, it didnt mean you werent my darling boy that I would do anything to keep you with me. Even now, I look at the grave in our yard and my heart breaks that you couldnt be here. But Sox your brother is keeping me company and he isnt nearly so self absorbed these days. He is keeping me company tonight, like you used to. I miss you so much my darling boy. Always in my heart, Love Mummy xxxx
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| Posted by Jennifer (Mummy) McCarthy on 06/17/2009 |
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Hello my darling boy, 1st July, and already 5 months since you went away. I have been seeing cats everywhere that look like you lately. On cat food tins, in a pet magazine, I dont know what it means but it makes me want to cry that you are not here with me and Heath and Sox. We all miss you darling Bam Bam, my darling sweet boy. I have been very depressed since you went away and some days I am up and get through it no problem, but most days I oversleep so I dont have to feel any pain and miss you so and realise that you arent here anymore. I think of you all the time darling. You are my dear sweet boy, my angel cat. Love Mummy xxx
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| Posted by Jennifer (Mummy) McCarthy on 07/01/2009 |
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Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn's rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush of birds in flight.
I am the stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there, I did not die...
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| Posted by EDGAR on 07/06/2009 |
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Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn's rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush of birds in flight.
I am the stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there, I did not die...
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| Posted by EDGAR on 07/06/2009 |
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God saw you were getting tired
And your cure was not meant to be
So he put his arms around you
And whispered "come to me"
A golden heart stopped beating
Adoring eye's went to rest
God broke our hearts to prove
He only takes the best.
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| Posted by EDGAR on 07/06/2009 |
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God saw you were getting tired
And your cure was not meant to be
So he put his arms around you
And whispered "come to me"
A golden heart stopped beating
Adoring eye's went to rest
God broke our hearts to prove
He only takes the best.
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| Posted by EDGAR on 07/06/2009 |
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Hello my darling boy. This is a big milestone my darling coming up in 2 days. It is the 6 month anniversary of your leaving.
Sox has been missing all afternoon. Please do not take him to be with you. I am not strong enough to cope.
I lost my job this month - things are bad. They will evict us from our home and we have nowhere else to go, no money to secure the bond on a new place and no job to secure a new place anyway. Oh Bam, it is like everything is falling apart since you went away. I am falling apart.
I cannot bear the thought of leaving you - I buried you in the yard at our new house so we would be together. What do I do? Do I leave you there or take you with us but where?
Please Bam Bam shine some light over us from where you are, we need some help so desperately my darling boy. No Bandit here to stroke and look up at me with understanding eyes, no comfort in your company - you were taken from me. Please do not take Sox too Bam. Not yet.
I love and miss you my darling boy. Mummy X
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| Posted by Mummy on 07/29/2009 |
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Thank you my darling Bam for sending your brother home to me safe and sound.
I love you always Bam.
Mummy X
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| Posted by Jennifer McCarthy (mummy) on 07/29/2009 |
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Thank you so much for your kind words and thoughtfullness. Pet lovers are all extraordinary people !
It is sad to read about your Bam Bam but I can tell he was loved beyond measure. I hope the pain is easing some for you now. I have a long way to go.
Take care
Shelly and Alex
Baby Marie's Humans
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| Posted by Shelly Stinnett on 07/29/2009 |
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Thank you so much for your kind words and thoughtfullness. Pet lovers are all extraordinary people !
It is sad to read about your Bam Bam but I can tell he was loved beyond measure. I hope the pain is easing some for you now. I have a long way to go.
Take care
Shelly and Alex
Baby Marie's Humans
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| Posted by Shelly Stinnett on 07/29/2009 |
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To Bandits Wonderful Family
A Taker-in of Stray Cats- by Darlene Goff
God sends some of us a special mission
To take in stray kitty-cats in any condition,
To feed them and give them a permanent home,
To love them and make them our very own.
They chase through the house; their potty box smells;
They seem to have secrets they're unwilling to tell.
They play till exhausted, then curl in your lap,
And settle themselves for a long comfy nap.
Some people are called to great wealth and power,
To run corporations, make big bucks per hour,
But others of us are only asked,
To take in little stray kitty-cats.
I asked God for things of importance to do,
Other than loving a good man and a bunch of kitties too.
He said, "Don't be self-righteous; learn from your mistakes,
And be glad I send kitty-cats and not My stray snakes."
I dreamed when I died I heard St. Peter say,
"What important things did you do each day?"
I felt Heaven for me was an impossibility
And that I should have lived my life much differently.
Then God said, "Come in. Have food and some drink,
And sit here in Heaven by your little cat Tink (Bandit);
For I gave you one of My most important tasks
When I asked you to be a taker-in of stray cats."
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| Posted by Rosemarie on 07/31/2009 |
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Today marks six months, since you had to leave your mummy. BamBam please watch over her, sweet kitty. I look at your pitures alot, I just want to cuddle you. Be in good care at rainbow bridge, you are so loved.
Love, Kathy
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| Posted by Kathy Patch on 07/31/2009 |
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It has been 6 months today my darling boy since you left us.
Everyone seems to have moved on and gotten over the fact that you have gone. Everyone but me.
Darling Bam Bam you were there when I needed you and I was there when you needed me. Together with were unstoppable, without you I am lost and lonely - an empty shell void of its oyster.
BamBam your heart was always bigger than your big belly, lol. I remember how much you loved to eat but even more, I remember how much you needed to be loved. And you were darling.
Every single day since you left is a day spent without you that causes a lump in my throat and a pain in my heart. Every month on the 1st I come on and light a candle for you. But today I will light a candle by your photo darling at home and hope that your beautiful spirit lingers for a moment with me, just to get through the final hour.
I love you boy with all my heart. Mummy X
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| Posted by Mummy (Jennifer McCarthy) on 08/01/2009 |
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I am a little late this month my darling boy Bam. Please forgive me. We are going through another tough patch and I am trying to find a job so that we are not evicted.
Seems like my road was meant to be winding, long and steep but I dont mind really - just wish you were here to travel it with me and Heath and Nan and Sox. Nothing is impossible when you have a loving family and ours is missing you right now.
I went to hospital the other night and before the ambulance came and I was scared and all alone I could swear I heard your meow at the front door. I told Nanny and she said that you must have been watching over me. Thank you my darling for sending help. I know you are ok in Heaven and have lots of friends and brothers and sisters at Rainbow's Bridge but that doesnt stop me missing you my darling sweet boy and your beautiful sweet, kind loving heart.
I torture myself over and again wondering if there was something else I should have done to keep you here or whether it would have been cruel. But what I did my darling was for you and I hope and pray that you dont think I didnt want you. It was for you and Sox that I got this house in the first place but you never made it in this lifetime. At least I have laid you to rest in the soft lush grass that I so desperately wanted you to lay on in this life and feel the warmth of the sunshine beaming down on your grave like you should have had shining down on you when you were alive but I only had that horrible cold old courtyard and I am sorry that I couldnt give you more than you had Bam but you had and always will have my love and my heart my dear sweet boy.
Love you always, Mummy X
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| Posted by Mummy (Jennifer McCarthy) on 09/09/2009 |
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It has been 8 months since you left us my beautiful boy and the pain lessens only a little and I miss you every bit as much as the first day you had to leave me.
Every month I think of you and cry after you and wonder why you had to go when you were so happy with us.
All the guilt I feel and continue to feel because I told the vet to give you the needle and end your pain and with it, your life.
It is so hard to get over it and move on. Everyone else seems to have done that but me. I feel so guilty that I couldnt have done more for you.
I tried to be as good a mother as I could to you and I am sorry that I failed you boy.
My beautiful big bear of a boy, my Bam Bam. I will always miss you and love you my darling boy.
Love Mummy xxx
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| Posted by Jennifer (Mummy) McCarthy on 10/02/2009 |
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Hello my darling boy, I know it isnt the first of the month - the anniversary of your death but everything is happening to our family and I feel so sad.
We lost Aunty Jean and then our dear family friend Pat all within a week of eachother. Now Uncle Arthur is in hospital with cancer as well as Aunty Bette and now Nanna Ewers has cancer too. Why is this happening to us boy:?
I miss your company and how you knew when I was upset and just sat with me. I feel so very lonely these days. I have Sox but Heath is growing up and has a girlfriend now and spends most of his time with her - I am all alone with the exception of your brother Sox to keep me company and I am thankful I have him.
I wish you could be here too boy. I will always love you.
Mummy xxx
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| Posted by Mummy on 10/21/2009 |
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Hello mummy's darling boy. Another month has passed since your leaving and it has now been 9 whole months.
I still look out from our verandah at your gravesite and cry silent tears for you my darling. No-one mentions your name to me anymore. Everything for them is as it were. But not me my Bam. I miss you soooooo much it hurts.
I love you always boy
Mummy xxxx
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| Posted by Mummy on 10/31/2009 |
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Every night in my dreams
I see you, I feel you
That is how I know you go on.
Far across the distance and spaces between us
You have come to show you go on.
Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on.
Once more you open the door
And you're here in my heart
And my heart will go on and on.
Love can touch us one time and last for a lifetime
And never let go till we're gone.
Love was when I loved you
One true time I hold you
In my life we'll always go on.
Near, far wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on.
Once more, you open the door
And you're hear in my heart
And my heart will go on and on.
You're here, there's nothing I fear
And I know that my heart will go on.
We'll stay forever this way
You are safe in my heart
And my heart will go on and on.
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| Posted by EDGAR on 11/16/2009 |
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Every night in my dreams
I see you, I feel you
That is how I know you go on.
Far across the distance and spaces between us
You have come to show you go on.
Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on.
Once more you open the door
And you're here in my heart
And my heart will go on and on.
Love can touch us one time and last for a lifetime
And never let go till we're gone.
Love was when I loved you
One true time I hold you
In my life we'll always go on.
Near, far wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on.
Once more, you open the door
And you're hear in my heart
And my heart will go on and on.
You're here, there's nothing I fear
And I know that my heart will go on.
We'll stay forever this way
You are safe in my heart
And my heart will go on and on.
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| Posted by EDGAR on 11/16/2009 |
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Every night in my dreams
I see you, I feel you
That is how I know you go on.
Far across the distance and spaces between us
You have come to show you go on.
Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on.
Once more you open the door
And you're here in my heart
And my heart will go on and on.
Love can touch us one time and last for a lifetime
And never let go till we're gone.
Love was when I loved you
One true time I hold you
In my life we'll always go on.
Near, far wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on.
Once more, you open the door
And you're hear in my heart
And my heart will go on and on.
You're here, there's nothing I fear
And I know that my heart will go on.
We'll stay forever this way
You are safe in my heart
And my heart will go on and on.
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| Posted by EDGAR on 11/16/2009 |
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Hello Bam Bam,
Just wanted to say hi. It's been awhile since I stopped by. Happy Holidays.
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| Posted by EDGAR on 12/17/2009 |
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Happy Birthday darling Bammy, I still miss your dear little face following me everywhere and the comfort of your company late at night when everyone else is asleep.
Bam Bam you were and still are a big part of my life darling boy and I find it so hard to move on. Things are slowly and minutely getting better for us but you are not here to share that and I ache with a pain in my heart that no-one will ever understand unless they have loved and lost a companion as dear as you are to me my darling boy.
I wanted you to know that although you were taken away from us, you are never far from us whilst my heart continues beating.
I love you boy.
MummyX
Happy Birthday from us all darling Bam Bam with love mummy, nanny, Heath and Sox XXXX
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| Posted by Mummy, Heath, Nan & Sox on 12/18/2009 |
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Merry Christmas darling Bammy. u r always in my thoughts darling. love always Mummy, Heath, Nan and Sox X
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| Posted by Mummy on 12/25/2009 |
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Hello my darling boy,
I am a little late this month wishing you a Happy New Year and lighting a candle to acknowledge that another month has passed since you left.
I apologise but I had no internet over the holidays because my work closed down. But you were and always are, in my thoughts every day darling boy.
I will never stop thinking of you or loving you Bam - I promise you that until the day I die.
It is almost a year since you went away Bammy. That seems hard to believe. The pain isnt as raw as it was back then but there is still a big hole in my heart from the day you left and nothing is going to fill it darling.
Your loving mummy forever
Jen X
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| Posted by Mummy on 01/15/2010 |
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Darling Bam Bam, I cannot believe it has been a whole year since you left me, you had to leave us. Your family.
Everyone told me it would get easier with time but how much time must I wait for this emptiness to leave me Bammy? Oh darling boy, I miss you still and grieve you still and I love your brother Sox with all my heart but we have a different relationship to the one I had with you Bammy.
You and I were bound by more than love, werent we boy? It was a dependency between the both of us - you needed me to express your bladder and I needed you to be my little mate, every night sitting by the computer together while I worked - keeping each other company. I miss it so much boy. I miss YOU so much my darling Bammy.
With all my love forever, your devoted Mummy X
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| Posted by Mummy on 02/04/2010 |
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Hello Bammy my darling boy, Well I have made it through the one year period and survived. I dont know how I did it at times Bam. How it is now 1 year and 1 month since you left my life, my world but not my love.
I weeded your grave today in the backyard and tenderly placed our purple blooms on your gravesite as a testiment to how much you still mean to me. Always know that I will never stop thinking of you tenderly or loving your sweet gentle nature and wishing you were still around to share in our pretty yard with your brother Sox.
Maybe not in reality but I know that somewhere you are watching over us all. I sometimes feel you around. People will think that is crazy and I dont care - well I dont tell anyone, I just acknowledge you to myself and know you are close by. Like you will always been close in my heart darling Bam Bam.
I miss you bubba.
Love Mummy X
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| Posted by Mummy on 03/06/2010 |
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Hey Bammy,
Quite a bit late getting a candle lit for you this month. Sorry boy. Not because I dont think of it - sometimes cant gain internet access where I am - work etc. they have certain websites blocked. You know how much I loved you. I know you will forgive me being a bit tardy.
Things are financially as tough as ever Bam. If something drastic doesnt happen soon, we will have to move out and go who knows where.
It started me thinking about what I would do about your grave which is in the yard - do I leave you at peace or take you with us and rebury you. But my mother thinks that is a horrid thing to even think about - desecration of a grave she called it but I would find it heartbreaking to leave you behind.
Then I started thinking about when you first started to live with us and trust us - we had to move (seems thats all we do our whole lives - move and relocate, move and relocate, doesnt it boy? Dont worry, its even more horrid to me).
Remember how your old family had left you behind when they moved and how you found refuge under our house - scared and alone and I lured you out with food and gentle words and actions until eventually you trusted me. Then when you saw our boxes that we were packing you knew we were moving and you were so scared that we would leave you behind too that you started sleeping on my bed every night. I loved that Bammy. I loved you.
Then fate took a cruel twist and you were hit by the car and I couldnt let you sleep on my bed or the lounge any more because your bladder used to leak and I had to banish you to the yard and laundry of a night to sleep. I know you were confused boy and Im so sorry but there was nothing I could do about it. I loved you and I spent all my money, time and energy trying to keep you with us but I knew you were hurt that you didnt feel part of the family anymore. It wasnt our house boy and there was carpet and you wouldnt stay on the mat that I put there for you so I had to lock you out. Im so sorry that you felt hurt.
Oh Bam. I feel so guilty during those last days that I didnt take more notice of you. Everything was going wrong - everything always goes wrong for me Bam. I dont know why or what Ive done but it does. Life is just one drama after another until I dont feel like I want to keep trying to survive any more. I dont even think I want to survive anymore boy.
I miss you and Im always lonely. Even in a room full of people, I always feel lonely. Even more than when Im alone. Ive never fitted in anywhere except with you and animals.
I miss you my Bam Bam.
Love Mummy XXXX
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| Posted by Jennifer (Mummy) McCarthy on 04/19/2010 |
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Hey Bammy darling boy, it has now been 1 year and 4 months since you had to leave us and still I mourn.
We had to move house again last weekend and I had to say goodbye to your grave for the last time yesterday. I am so forlorn in having to leave you behind but everyone told me it would be wrong to disturb your grave to take you with us and that your soul is with God and your heart is with us wherever we go. I hope you understand that I love you Bammy and didnt want to leave you behind but I guess they are right that you will always be with us in heart and soul and that your body is an empty vessel now and not really you that I left behind but it still breaks my heart Bam. Im so sorry darling. I so didnt want to leave you there. But you will have my love and my heart boy forever. Your loving mummy X
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| Posted by Mummy on 06/01/2010 |
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Hi my darling Bammy,
Its been a few months since Ive been on boy. Im sorry. I dont have regular access to the internet like before but I think of you all the time darling.
Every time I sit with your brother Sox I tenderly think of you. Sometimes I replay over and over the little video on my phone of you greeting Heath at and me at the front gate of our old townhouse where we used to live just before you passed away.
Bam, I still miss you so terribly darling. I wait for the wound to heal but it never does. Others seem to be getting over their pets now that lost them around the same time I lost you but not for me my boy. You are still a very big part of my life and will always be in my heart and thoughts my darling boy.
I sit here at 2 in the morning with tears streaming down my face thinking of you and wishing I could see you, touch you and hear you meow just once more. No, thats a lie Bam. I wish it could be every day not just once but the pain never goes away Bammy.
You know how much I baby and love Sox but I never stop loving and wishing you were here with us - whole and healthy like you were when you first came into my life. Happy and secure and snuggled on my bed.
Ive been thru so much and you were there for me and now I just think of you when things are hard and wish I could pat you and just see your soulful eyes peering up at me. I love you darling Bammy. Forever and always Mummy X
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| Posted by Mummy on 07/17/2010 |
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Thinking of you and your family today Bam Bam on the 1st anniversity of my Emily Rose's passing. I will always remember the kind words they gave me to help me thourgh the pain last year. I pray their own pain has become manageable. God Bless you and your family always.
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| Posted by RoseMarie on 07/20/2010 |
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Thank you for sending Bam Bam to be Emily's angel cat. I know they have been buddies since Emily joined him a year ago today. Wishing Bam's family peace. I will remember all the love with you.
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| Posted by RoseMarie on 07/20/2010 |
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It has been almost 1 year and a half since you left us Bam. And still I love and think of you. I feel ashamed that it is not as often as it used to be boy but you are in my prayers every night and I pray you still watch down on us and are waiting for me darling for when I come to you. Look after your friends and family til I get there. I love you with all my heart darling. Mummy X
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| Posted by Mummy on 07/31/2010 |